No, it is not Donald Trump I worry about. He is beyond commentary, and I do not want to be just one more person giving him airtime.
It is the way people, my people, have rallied around him, and elevated him, that brings an ache to my heart. A small piece of me is inconsolable as I watch this emerge with all its naked truth.
It is not right, and long after the election is over, there is a new reality here. Sure, it may have always been here, just beneath the surface, but now, it has been fed and its fur is sleek.
My usual optimism, and the peaceful coexistence I cherish–my diligent acceptance that there is good for all bad, and light for all dark, and that it is the interplay between the two that makes us whole, needs a break today.
Today, I will be nurturing inward. Today, I will be resting. Today, I will be setting down my need for it to be different. I will be here, playing with my children, cleaning my home, caring for my dog, and watching football.
I will be listening–for that little feeling. The feeling that reality has not forsaken me, that the planets are still twirling around tiny me, and that it is going to be ok.
In the end, I already know. It WILL be ok, and it will be entirely awful. Side by side, and taking turns. Reality has not forsaken me. This IS our reality, and there is time for even the strongest to lay down their arms for one brief moment.